Monday, February 19, 2007

Virgin Spider Sex!!

This is funny... NOT the inspiration I need to write a love scene, but I stumbled across this tidbit while searching for info on how wolves mate. Don't ask how I Google.

"While mating, female Physocylus globosus spiders emit
high-frequency squeaks to let males know what they should be doing, a new study finds.
Called stridulations, the shrill cries sound like squeaky leather and are made in response to the rhythmic squeezing actions of the male's genitalia from inside the female during

A male spider's genitalia are located at the end of its pedipalp. During sex, he inserts this tip into the female. Muscles near the base of the pedipalp flex during sex, creating the rhythmic squeezing motions that cause a female to cry out... The researchers mated 68 virgin P. globosus females with two males. They found that the number of squeezes the males made were associated with the number of times the females cried out during sex. " From "Spider Cries Out While Mating by Ker Than, LIveScience Staff Writer."

68 virgins with two males??? Sounds like a Regency era romance novel. The rakish spiders of London. Hmmm. I could write a love scene based on spider sex... maybe Regency spiders...

Herman: "Oh my dear Constance your eight legs are so slender and hairy, you make me go wild. I will make you mine. You are one of the mothers of my children."

Constance: "Be gentle with me, Herman, you rake, I have heard of your prowess among the females, for was it not last night in London when you mated with over 2,000 females in the dusty corner of Lord Maplethorpe's ballroom?"

Herman: "They matter not to me, only you, Constance, you with your glistening fangs and your rounded abdomen. I will plant my seed into you now. I am hot for you, you little arachnoid. I am squeezing my huge manly pedipalp, cry out for me, my virgin lover, do it do it!"

Constance: "Oh, OHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!"

Herman: "Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh" Collapses atop his crawly lady love.

Constance: "Get off me before I eat you."


Mary Stella said...

That's hysterical, Bonnie! LOL Pedipalp... and romance authors think manhood and love muscle are bad. *vbg*

Jen said...

I never knew spider sex could be so hot! And funny! I'd love for someone to write a spider romance book with that scene and submit it to a major publisher. I then want a photo of the editor's face when s/he reads it!

Incidentally, I like a lot of the terms romance readers typically hate. "Manhood" is sexy to me. :)

Bonnie Vanak said...

Mary and Jen... hot spider sex, huh? LOL... I don't mind "manhood" but pedipalp just doesn't do it for me, lol.